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January 22, 2013
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'A blazing wave devours white shore,'

The poets muse on Feanor,

While they should wish him nothing more

Than swiftly falling ash.


In reckless words we forged our fate,

In white-hot script for cracking slate,

Each syllable the world's weight -

But gladly were we crushed.


I saw blood in the soft sea wrack;

Each sea-elf dead a mirror's crack

In our own faces staring back

From all the noble slain.


In Dior's blessed and empty face

I searched for us but found no trace.

The mirror shattered. Only grace

We bear no more stared back.


The waves closed over Elwing's head,

Dissolved the Light that silver bled

Into a face that held no dread;

So different from ourselves.


Not princes now, nor kings, but thieves,

And reckless as the falling leaves,

We take the Jewels and my heart grieves:

For all the world is stained.


For this the final Doom we bear:

In blood spilt red as Nelyo's hair;

The golden Vanyar lying there

Dead, even as our hearts.


The living Light is agony;

A shining, sharp finality:

A leap into eternity,

Into the mirror cracked.


Deep water hide this wretched Jewel!

A Silver flame in bloody pool;

All who might have called me fool

For drowning it are dead.


'A blazing wave devours white shore,'

The poets muse on Feanor,

While they should wish him nothing more

Than silent, faceless ash.

A poem for :iconauthors-club:'s The Unexpected Contest [link], detailing the journey of Maglor Feanorion from proud and Kinslaying prince to broken, but much wiser, wanderer. The repeated theme of the cracked mirror is supposed to show how Maglor sees himself and his brothers in the elves they kill at first, but gradually he sees himself less and less - not because the other elves have changed, but because Maglor himself has changed, and not for the better. Make sense? :D

Characters (c) Tolkien.
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:iconondosto:
Ondosto Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013  Student General Artist
Oh, so wonderful.

This made me so happy.

[Happy? Is that the right word?]

"While they should wish him nothing more

Than silent, faceless ash."

So beautiful...
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:iconhallosse:
hallosse Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013  Student General Artist
Thank you! :) Glad you liked it. I think I know what you mean about feeling happy...
Reply
:iconhelevornart:
HelevornArt Featured By Owner Feb 7, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Very beautiful! I love the story and the flow of the words, and your choice of rhyme scheme gives it an even more dramatic feel.
:love:
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:iconhallosse:
hallosse Featured By Owner Feb 7, 2013  Student General Artist
Thank you! I'm glad you like my work!
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:iconstrawberryjam1313:
StrawberryJam1313 Featured By Owner Jan 27, 2013
Oooh, that is incredibly deep. And wonderful poetry! The words stir up a very...I can't remember the word for it x.x Almost eerie, but not quite. But rather beautiful. My favourite line ' All who might have called me fool For drowning it are dead.' Ouch. So true, and yet...

And that cracked mirror motif is very well used :D I love it!
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:iconhallosse:
hallosse Featured By Owner Jan 28, 2013  Student General Artist
Thanks! Glad you like it. :D
Reply
:iconjariinforever:
jariinforever Featured By Owner Jan 23, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Really, really nice! You captured him very well.
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:iconhallosse:
hallosse Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2013  Student General Artist
Thanks. Glad you liked. :D
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:iconmelalina:
Melalina Featured By Owner Jan 23, 2013  Professional General Artist
Great work, but did you mean:
"For all the is world stained." OR "For all the world is stained."
Reply
:iconhallosse:
hallosse Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2013  Student General Artist
Thanks for commenting - and tanks for catching the typo! I will fix it.
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